You guys sure you want another round of squid ink?
Ahh!
- Ha ha!
You're not too bad for a human boy.
Not too bad? I'm better than that.
Huh?
Rrrr-yah!
Jake, do you hear that?
What'd you say? Wha! Whoa!
I think someone's crying.
- Rah! Ha ha! - Stop! This is serious!
I gotta go find out where that crying is coming from.
Get back here, you chicken!
What did you call me?
You can't just walk away from a roughhouse!
Hey! Listen up, you cold-hearted marauders.
Somebody's out there crying for help,
and I'm not gonna ignore that.
Oh, here it comes.
Lay it down, Finn!
A long time ago, when I was a baby,
I went boom-boom on a leaf.
Boom! Boom!
Then I fell backwards and sat in my own boom-boom.
I cried for a day...
but no one came to help me.
That day, I vowed to help anyone in need,
no matter how small their problem.
And that's why I need to go.
- Whoo! - Yeah!
That's what I'm talking about.
- Yeah! - Way to go, Finn.
He still cries when he poops.
Thanks for being cool, guys. Wait up, Finn!
It's coming from up there.
Someone must be caught in that avalanche.
Let's get it on.
So... who's crying?
I am.
Whoa! Aww. What's wrong, fella?
You crying boulders?
Yes.
I am sad, having been forced to watch
roughhousing men for centuries.
Oh! I see.
You're feeling left out, and you want to roughhouse, too!
Well, I'll take you on, tough guy.
Come on, back me up, Jake.
Yeah, do it, Finn! Hit him with a boulder.
And then hit him with another rock.
Please! No roughhousing.
It m-makes me...
so... sad!
What? Why?
Because they're so rough on each other.
But a smooth, well-controlled roughhouse
bolsters your guts and, uh...
rejuvenates the muscle.
No! It's raunchy and maddening.
All those men and their disgusting fantastic bodies.
Whoa. This guy's got problems.
Look, Mommy.
Honey, don't look. That kid's got problems.
I'll help you, Mountain. - Whoa! What?
I'll stop those roughhousers from being rough.
Really? You'd do that for me?
Yes, sir. My name's Finn...
and I'm gonna help you out.
But, Finn, we're not gonna
shut down the roughhouse for real, are we?
No way, but there's got to be some kind of solution.
I'll figure this out, Mountain Man, yep.
Hey, you guys. - Ah, Finn.
Ready to get destroyed?
N-No.
Uh, wait. Um...
actually, can you guys s-stop being so rough?
What?
Whoa, whoa, whoa. What are you talking about, Finn?
Could you... just tone down the roughhousing a-a little?
- What? - Whoa, whoa, whoa.
Hey, it's all right, fellas.
Finn, I'm sure this "tone down the roughhousing" thing
has something to do with your boom-boom,
and I can respect that.
But how can we possibly make roughhousing less rough?
I think I have a perfect idea.
This will soften your punches for smooth knockouts,
like punching a dream.
Quack! Quack!
Ha ha!
Meow! Meow!
Ha ha! Pigs on my knees!
Pigs on my knees!
- That's like math. Yeah. - Mathematical.
What do you think? Fixed all your problems, right?
No! That was terrible.
Now the men are just punching animals.
It's worse than before,
and it's in no way a good solution.
- I'm sorry. - Well, you should be.
It's not fair to those animals and it's not fair to me.
I might just start to cry again, you know?
- Oh, man. - Come on, Jake.
I gotta give this another shot.
Finn, this guy seems like a real nutjob.
You know what I mean?
You don't want to get sucked into this guy's hang-ups.
Yes, I do, Jake.
That's what I vowed — to help anyone in need,
no matter how small their problem.
At least I have to try, brother.
So be it, brother.
Hey, guys, I'm back.
Hey, guys. Guys?
Men, men, please stop for a second.
Aah!
Men! Boys? Please? l-I have more to ask of you.
Bros? My bros? Brother?
What? Did you just pet me?
I'llpet you. Pet, pet.
Hey!
Pet, pet.
Hey, this is great!
Hey, did you just pet me?
- Yeah! I did! - Well, I'm petting you back.
W-Whoa.
W-What the...
this is awesome!
All right! This could be it.
Finn — ha ha ha! —
you're really mixing things up
in the best of ways today.
Maybe you can solve everyone's problems,
like a cherub with his bottom out.
Okay, cool.
Hey, I'm gonna go tell the mountain.
All right. I'm gonna...
Mm! Ahh! Mm!
I'm gonna stay here this time.
So everything's fine this time, right?
Yes! Thank you, Finn.
So the mountain is totally fine with everybody petting.
I feel great. - Right on, man.
The marauders are going crazy over the petting.
They're petting each other raw. Check 'em out.
That's — okay.
T-That's — yeah, that's fine.
They look kind of... rashy.
Hey, Finn!
Hey, man, uh, as you can see, the petting got sort of...
out of hand.
Stop that! We are done with that!
We're going back to roughhousing.
No, wait, fellas.
T-The mountain doesn't like roughhousing.
Well, wedon't like not roughhousing.
You see the problem here?
Well, what if...
what if we rotate the entire mountain 180 degrees around
so the mountain's facing the other direction?
That way, you guys can keep roughhousing,
and the mountain doesn't have to watch it.
Sounds fine with me.
What do you say, Mountain?
That's okay.
Only if you guys promise to stay healthy
and not roughhouse after you rotate me.
That mountain can talk?
Just promise him anything. He's out of his gourd.
Uh... yeah, we'll stay healthy.
Oh-ho! Thank goodness!
All right, kids, spin me the math around.
Now I just need to set up some sort of pulley system.
No! Over here!
Don't turn him around!
if you do, I'll miss looking at his beautiful back.
It's gorgeous!
Huh? What? Really?
What? Uh, but — ugh.
Okay, um, maybe what we can do is —
Excuse me. - Huh?
We need your help.
There's no music playing, and we desperately want to dance.
Oh, uh, hold on just a second, you guys.
I'll, uh, I'll help you out in one minute, okay?
Hey! Pipe down over there!
I want some peace and quiet!
Uh, let me just, uh —
- I need to be pollinated. - Huh?
Pollinated all over to make my babies.
Everybody, please, one problem at a time.
My butt's itchy, but I can't scratch it.
This water's too cold.
Mommy.
Please keep the flies away from our mommy.
That guy stole our triangle.
They swiped my plum.
We wanna roughhouse.
I'm naked!
What's happening?
Aaah!
Everybody wants different things,
and some of them want stuff
that's exactly the thing the others don't want.
Whoa, dude, hold on.
So this guy wants this, and that guy wants that,
but, man, what do youwant?
What do youwant?
What do you want, baby? Why are you crying?
Margaret, this baby won't tell me what's wrong with it,
and it's stuck to a leaf and it stinks.
Give it here, Joshua.
This baby just needs some love and kisses to be happy.
Mwah! Mwah-mwah-mwah!
There? See? Now it's happy.
You just kissed a boom-boom baby,
so don't expect any more sugar from me, sweetheart,
until we wash your dirty, dirty face.
Hmm.
Jake, what I want is to help anyone in need
so everyone is happy.
Wow, that's pretty corny, man, but let's do it, dude!
Whoo-hoo!
Ready over there, Mushroom Gang?
Ready, Finn!
- Ready, dragon? - Yes, sir!
Ready, Mountain Man?
I'm ready.
Go!
Hey! The flies are leaving!
[ pop! ] Eh! Can't hear a thing.
- Yahoo! Yeah! - Yay.
Oh!
Pollen! Here they come!
Oh! Yeah!
Yeah-hoo-hoo!
Not naked.
Hey, I can't see anything.
Is anyone roughhousing?
- No. - Radical.
And I can still see this gorgeous back.
Thank you, Finn.
You really helped everybody.
Stop! I've got a problem.
Well, what's the matter?
This dolphin fell in love with me.
That's the oppositeof a problem.
Adventure time!