♪ I think it's time to blow this scene ♪
♪ Get everybody and the stuff together ♪
♪ OK, 3-2-1, let's jam ♪
It's really not my style, you know.
Just sitting around waiting for nothing like this.
You pick a point, and you keep on waiting.
That's the secret to fishing in the big pond.
Maybe you picked the wrong point.
Or maybe it's the wrong pond?
Or maybe the bait should stop complaining.
What are you fishing for?
Just your everyday pirates.
Starship pirates, they're called.
Pirates?
Barbaric slime who ransack ships and take whatever they want.
Let's keelhaul the dirty scalawags!
What the hell's the story with Spike not being around?
He went to have the ship overhauled, and he never checked in!
Thanks there, little buddy.
Man... that Spike did it again.
What's he doing without checking in with us like that?
- You're late, Doohan. - Yes!
Yes! Yes, yes, yes!
- Hey. - Uh-huh...
- Hey!
Strike three! Batter out, and the game's over!
Oh, man!
Dammit! Why the hell didn't they send in a pinch hitter?
Eightwood's too old! Don't they know that by now?
Don't you think so?
Where the hell's Doohan?
I'm afraid he's a busy old man at the moment.
I'm Miles, his assistant. Good to meet you.
Man, he was the toughest rookie around when he started 14 years ago.
He slammed the balls one after the other and
brought the Blue Sox back from the basement that season,
but today, Randy Hill hit three consecutive home runs.
How do you compete with that?
Oh man, you should've heard the crowd.
They went crazy!
Hey, do people ever tell you that you don't talk much?
Hey, well, do people ever tell you that you talk too much?
Hmm... I guess so.
That's Swordfish there, isn't it?
- That ship in the back. - Yeah.
Whoa, isn't that the amazing mono-racer that the old man built?
She's just an old ship to me. Can't get rid of her.
I know how you feel, man. I can't begin to tell you how many times
I've tried to quit being a Blue Sox fan over the years, I tell you,
it's like I'm falling in love with the wrong woman over and over!
Ah jeez, not again...
Hey, old man!
- Hey. Long time no— - Hey.
Miles, where's the checklist?
It's there. I put it on the pilot's seat.
He's trying to fix up that old ancient relic?
I think it's useless.
The computer isn't compatible with the old mono-system it's got.
Miles! I'll need an EV transmitter, a main gear absorber, rebuilt,
and a 3/8 pneumatic tube, pronto.
A 3/8? We don't have anything rare like that.
Then order it from Reggie. He's gotta have it.
All right, all right.
He sure knows how to use people. See you later.
What a hobby.
- You catch it, Faye? - No, not me, I— Where?
- It's close! Damn, it's that rotten bait. - Watch it.
Hey, it's a good-looking machine.
Transferring wealth from the fortunate to the unfortunate can be very fulfilling.
It's what charity is all about. Don't you think so?
Yeah, that's right. Social reform all the way.
Exactly. Poor unfortunates like us have every right to take it.
- What is this? - What is it, the cops?
OK, that's enough, boys.
Bounty hunter house call.
- Harman? - That-a-girl, come on in.
Hey! Look out, Faye!
What? What the hell?
I didn't do anything!
Hey, Ruth! There's one right behind you.
- Ooh, it's a big one! - I see it.
Man, what a piece of crap.
Payback time, pal.
Nyong!
Mono-system malfunction.
Emergency pilot program engaged.
Stop it! Do you hear me?
Dammit!
The mono-system sounds shaken up pretty badly.
Shut it down!
The accelerator pump is completely shot.
I know that.
And another thing I noticed, there's no silencer on the fuel injector.
There's no need.
What? But it's too noisy, and the vibrations—
Don't you get it? A silencer would only mask the underlying problems.
Now hurry up and connect the injector.
You know, nowadays, a 3/8 pneumatic tube isn't in style anymore.
What do you say we go with a 5/0 and update this relic?
Enough, Miles.
We can even kick it into freestyle with full auto-navigation!
Ow!
Now listen up. You either work for this machine, or it works for you.
Make up your mind.
- I was trying to— - Just go.
You haven't changed, huh?
You're gonna chase off another assistant if you keep that up.
Well, maybe I'm just like old Swordfish there, Spike my boy.
I'm just trying to make a point.
Haven't ever heard that one before.
If you keep on pushing it like this,
you're really going to get cut down to size, for good.
Sorry. I'm not exactly the delicate, cautious type.
It's here. I got that rare 3/8 pneumatic tube you requested.
Hello? Oh, it's you.
The mysterious missing guy. Where you been hiding out?
I'm still at Doohan's shop. So where's Jet?
He's got his hands full right now.
He said he was working on some kind of bacteria or something.
Bacteria?
No, it's a virus, Faye. A computer virus.
Well, it's the same thing.
Uh... uh-uh.
Starting with the mono-system, orbit calculator,
navigator, engine control, communications circuit...
They're all gone.
I don't get it. How about using English, huh?
The computer's kaput, and we're drifting through space toward certain oblivion.
Definitely got that.
So what do you think? It's the newest one.
Can't find it elsewhere, I can promise you that.
A mono-computer.
How about 150... No, 100,000. It's a bargain.
A bargain, huh? Well, not when the scraps can be traced back.
So who's the dealer?
Where did you get it from, huh?
You say a truck? What kind of a truck?
- A penguin... - delivery truck.
A delivery truck?
Are you sure about the information?
Yeah. They were doing business by the Orbit Drive-in.
I get it, it wouldn't be suspicious if
anyone saw a delivery truck driving around there.
So then, how we gonna counter the hacks?
Don't get yourself harpooned.
- And? - Anything else?
They dared to call this ship a worthless piece of crap!
And they made a complete mess of my Hammerhead!
Unlike someone else here, I always return what I owe!
Gee, what an admirable virtue.
I'm really not up for this.
I just an invoice from Doohan with your name on it.
If they're physically sending the computer virus to us,
then they haven't developed an antivirus program for it.
Here's the plan. We'll surprise them with our own secret weapon.
What, Jet? That's just a normal transmitter.
If we get infected by the virus, cut off the entire mono-system.
Navigation and communications will crash.
Exactly. That's why I'm going to assist you through this from here on.
This uses the old satellite transmission wave signals for guidance.
So it, in effect, bypasses the mono-system.
And another run scores against the Blue Sox.
Henderson looks in for the sign...
That's some secret weapon you got there, Jet.
Henderson throws... high and away, ball two.
Bosh is 0-for-2 in today's game. He hasn't been playing up to his ability
since that knee injury during spring training.
Steps up to the plate again, here's the pitch.
Swing, and it's a long drive... Oh, just foul!
It was a penguin you said, wasn't it?
Yeah. I'm sure it was a purple penguin.
No one said two of them.
Wait a minute... It might be a real delivery service.
We've got to figure out if they're legit or not.
That's easy, we just shoot and see who hightails it outta there.
This is the first time I agree with you on something.
Huh? Wait a minute!
Did you consider the possibility they're both real?
Uh, they're both running.
I guess we didn't discuss that option.
You handle that one.
Payback time for yesterday, boys.
Forgive us! Please!
We'll pay the parking ticket, I promise!
I gotcha!
Spike, keep them out!
It'll be a mess if they spread the virus inside.
I know.
Two outs, Kalinski's up next.
Let's see what you got, hotshot.
- He's here. - Meddling mallethead.
I think he's going after the arm.
The little wiseass. You there, Ruth?
Ready to go anytime.
Geronimo!
Have a taste of this.
Excellent!
Bingo!
A persistent little devil.
Cut the mono-system!
I did!
Looks like the idiot cut off his mono-system, Harman.
Hey, George, look at this.
And he's in the Earth's gravitational field!
Old man, listen here! This sounds pretty bad!
- You did it before, right? - Like I remember!
No use! There's nothing we can do!
You idiot! Hurry up and do something about this, quick!
Goddammit, move it! Get outta the way!
We're falling! Falling!
Spike, I'll be right there.
I'm calculating the interception course you're on.
Until that time, somehow keep control manually.
Even if everything was normal, it's tough to get outta this damn place.
Like I need you to tell me that.
And I just overhauled this thing.
Hell, I'll take my chances.
- Spike, above you. - What?
That old hulk looks like a goddess to me.
Shit, the virus...
- You OK? - I'm still alive.
Let's regroup.
No way! You're kidding, right, old man?
You're not serious about this antique piece of junk!
I wouldn't do anything I wasn't serious about.
Don't just stand there.
Get a move on, and go get me some fuel.
Yes, sir!
Spike? Can you hear me, bud?
I've got a calculation.
It'll take seven hours for me to rendezvous with you.
Come on, Jet. You're joking, right?
We're too close to Earth.
The orbital paths I can take are limited.
Isn't there a way you can just swing on by?
If I continue plunging in at this angle,
both the Bebop and the Swordfish will burn to nothing.
- Hey, Jet. - Hm?
You know, I got some whiskey hidden behind the fridge.
Why don't you help yourself, bud.
Huh? What went wrong?
The fuel tanks are empty. There's nothing I can do now.
How about I rendezvous and tow you back, in exchange for the whiskey?
I heard the conversation.
Give me the exact coordinates of the Swordfish.
Doohan!
How the hell did you—
Spike, find something that can be used as an air brake so you can decelerate.
Decelerate?
If you decelerate within the Earth's atmosphere,
the gravitational pull will accelerate you instead,
which will give you enough speed to escape, however,
you have to maintain the ship at a certain angle. Too far in either direction,
and you'll be thrown out to the other end of the universe.
Like I said before, I'm not the delicate, cautious type.
Spike...
I know you can do it, boy.
I didn't give you the Swordfish for nothing, you know.
Yeah, don't you go and crash either, old man.
Maximum propulsion.
There's still time to change your mind and leave, Miles.
Negative. Blue Sox fans never leave the game early.
- Let's go. - All right!
I'm flying...
And I thought I was afraid to fly!
Lower the nose point-six degrees.
You're in too deep, Spike! You'll burn to a crisp!
This is your last chance.
It's in there!
It went in, that was perfect!
- Doohan, you saved my ass. - Not yet.
Most of the heat-resistant tiles have peeled off.
The temperature's rising.
The landing wheels aren't retracting!
Yep, and the number two nozzle won't work either.
What? Are you for real?
- We can't land without them! - Oh well.
Whatever happens, happens.
I knew I shouldn't have come up here! I'm only 18, I don't wanna die yet! I've never even been with a woman!
Somebody, help!
♪ Aishiteta to nageku ni wa ♪
♪ Amari ni mo toki wa sugite shimatta ♪
♪ Mada kokoro no hokorobi o ♪
♪ Iyasenu mama kaze ga fuiteru ♪
♪ Kawaita hitomi de dareka naite kure ♪
♪ The real folk blues ♪
♪ Hontou no kanashimi ga shiritai dake ♪
♪ Doro no kawa ni tsukatta ♪
♪ Jinsei mo waruku wa nai ♪
♪ Ichido kiri de owarunara ♪
Next episode: "Pierrot le Fou."