Hammer!
Hammer.
Screwdriver?
Screwdriver.
Monkey wrench!
Monkey wrench.
There.
That ought to do it.
One supercharged,
super defective, motorized skateboard at your disposal!
Gee, Uncle Fester.
Are you sure it's got all the glitches in?
There's only one way to find out.
Try her.
Oh, boy!
Did I hear someone say something about a supercharged, super defective, motorized skateboard?
Oh, boy!
whoaaaaaa!
Clear the deck... !
Fester... !
Stop this crazy thing... !
Your turn.
Now!
[ GOMEZ, GRUNTING in PAIN ] Oh... ! Oh... ! Oh... ! Oh... ! Oh... !
Oh look, I found your hand grenade under the couch?
Really, where?
Haiyaa!
Never let your guard down!
You deliberately deceived me, Gomez.
Nice move.
Darling!
We've got a letter from the city.
They're putting a highway through our property.
Let's hope it's behind the house!
So we can hear it in the bedroom... ! S
Yes, I always sleep better with a little diesel in the air~
Wedneday and Pugsley'll be so glad!
Now they won't have to go so far to cause a four car collision!
The city council has declared our property condemned~
Ow!
It's about some time that someone recognized this house for the historical landmark it is!
Oh, my.
We're to be evicted.
Are you sure they don't mean convicted?
That must be for me.
One more place setting, and you'll break dear, old, Uncle Lobotomy's record.
Actually, it'll be a tie!
You're forgetting the plate in his head!
Fester, old man, did you have to set off that explosion, just now?
A little later, and I woulda broken more plates.
Sorry, Gomez.
But it wasn't me.
Are we expecting guests?
Amateurs.
The front porch is all set to blow.
Great.
Right on schedule.
Wait a minute.
What are those people doing here?
Good afternoon.
I'm Gomez Addams.
This is my lovely wife Morticia.
And you are?
I'm Tim Cushman, the city planner. I'm...
overseeing the highway construction.
It's a pleasure to meet you.
I must say, we're very excited about the new highway.
Really?
Who wouldn't be?
The incessant roar of the 18 wheelers?
The toxic fumes?
The blade with angry drivers leaning on their horns.
Eh...
Didn't you get my, uh, my letter?
Of course.
We're very proud.
Would you like to see the house?
Please come inside. We'll give you the grand tour.
Well, okay.
So where exactly does the road pass?
Behind the house or in front?
We were hoping it would be near the garden,
so the fumes would suffocate those dreadful rose bushes.
Mrs Addams,
the road goes right through this room.
Perfect.
How many lanes?
Uh.
Uh, four.
You're welcome to use the hallway for a carpool lane!
Or perhaps you could put an off-ramp through the den.
Mr. and Mrs. Addams,
your property has been expropriated by the city.
I mean, you'll be paid at a fair price.
Don't be silly.
We should be paying you.
Mr. Addams,
we are going to destroy your house.
Our demolition crew is, is rigging it right now!
Demolition?
That sounds like fun.
Mama and I will pack a picnic lunch.
We'll make a day of it!
Y - you just don't get it.
We are going to be blowing this, this... eyesore,
to smithereens, in the next 24 hours.
You have to vacate at once.
Where do you want the suitcases?
I'm sorry, I thought I told you to leave them upstairs.
Oh, right.
I guess I forgot.
Mush!
I hope you find that packing spell, soon.
We're running out of boxes.
I know there's one in here somewhere...
Melting...
Milking...
Moo-ing...
Ah, here we are.
Moving!
Two emu wings...
A peacock beak...
A sprig... of mint.
Looks like you've run out.
Oh, drat!
Will this do?
Mint.
Lint.
Close enough!
Are we there, yet?
Well, that's it.
All of my unearthly possessions,
packed away in twenty padded boxes.
Well,
I guess that's everything.
Oh, darling.
To think, tomorrow morning, we'll be waking up in a rental house, overlooking...
the golf course.
It's only temporary, querida!
I already have a real estate agent
looking into that nice, deserted mineshaft,
right by the railroad tracks.
Children?
Have you finished packing yet?
Yes, Mother.
[ GRANDMAMA, in a BOX ] They might as well get this over with.
And call the movers.
Wait.
In a minute.
Querida, one last stroll around the house?
Oh, Gomez.
That would bring up so many... painful memories.
Let's do it.
Oh, I'm gonna miss this decaying, old staircase.
Oh!
Ahhh, sprained it!
You just can't find rotted, splintering wood like this, in a brand-new house.
Oh, look, Gomez.
The very spot where our little Pugsley said his first word!
Goo goo... gaah.
Goo goo...
Gahh...
Pugsley, I have a surprise for you...
Ope.
Ahhh... !
Cara mia, shall we?
For old time's sake?
Mais oui, mon cher~
Tish! That's...
French.
You know, Tish?
I think this is the spot where Fester made his first important discovery.
I wonder what would happen if I mixed these together?
Sorry.
You can still make out some of the burn marks on the wall.
See there?
His shadow's been afraid of him ever since... !
Ohhh, there, there, querida!
We may be leaving old memories behind,
but think of all the fun we'll have making new ones~
Gomez~
This old house has been very good to us.
It's like one of the family.
I hate to interrupt your little romp down memory lane,
but we have some moving to do, remember?
I guess we should all just be grateful for all the bad times we've had here.
I know.
If only these old walls could talk.
Well, actually, I'm more of a singer!
Stop it!
Sorry.
Well, they can demolish our home, but not our spirit.
Tish, we can't let them pick this house away from us!
We're Addamses!
Everybody unpack!
We're not going anywhere!
Owww!
[ GRANNY, GRIPPING edge of BOX ] Will someone please unpack me?
Let them bring out their ammunition, their dynamite, their wrecking balls... !
As long as there's ice water flowing through our veins,
we shall not give up the fort!
Now you're talk — !
Oh, Gomez.
I love it when you take an irrational stand,
against overwhelming odds, with no hope of success.
So, we shall save our house!
Or fight to the death, trying!
Either way, we can't lose.
It's so nice to have our home back.
I know.
How could we let a little thing like a court order,
convince us to leave?
Mr Cushman.
Ahhh, Mr Cushman!
What are you people still doing here?
We decided not to leave.
Although we do appreciate your trying to build a highway through our home.
Mr and Mrs Addams, you're in direct violation of the law.
Well,
we try.
This is not a joking matter.
The demolition crew will be moving in first thing tomorrow.
We're taking this house down,
whether you're in it,
or not.
How can we resist an invitation like that?
Men?
Women?
Thing.
Come the dawn, our family fortress will be under attack
by a government bent on seizing our land for its own.
We'll be greatly outnumbered.
Our supplies are running low.
And I haven't the slightest ideal what I'm talking about!
Awooooooooooooooo... !
That noise.
It's like talons, scraping across an enormous blackboard... !
I know.
Do it again.
All those willing to defend our home to the bitter end,
and endure unbearable pain and suffering in the process,
step across this line.
Pugsley is willing to die, twice.
Hedonist.
Then it's settled.
As Great Uncle Winston Addams once said,
'We shall defend our home no matter what the course.'
" We shall fight in the cemetery."
[ MORTICIA, in ENGLISH ACCENT ] "We shall fight in the den."
[ GRANDMAMA, in ENGLISH ACCENT ] "We shall fight, in the kitchen!"
"We... shall never... surrender!"
Well!
This is the place.
Come on, men!
A-hem.
And women.
We've got a highway to build.
I want to see this house,
reduced to rubble,
by the end of the day.
Are you sure there's nobody in the house?
Don't be ridiculous.
They were warned three times to vacate the premises.
No one would be crazy enough to stay in there!
Well, what are you waiting for?
Detonate!
Sorry.
Thought you were talkin' to me.
I don't believe this... !
Get to work!
I want this blasting to start exactly on schedule!
This city is getting its highway,
if it kills me!
As you win.
AHH!
That's it!
I'm going to go in there, and drag them out, myself!
Ugh!
Ahh!
Let me in this instant!
Let... me... innnnn!
Mr and Mrs Addams, I demand you let me in!
Never!
This is a fight to the death!
Remember tha — !
What was it, again?
The Alamo.
Ahh, yes. The Alamo.
Thank you, querida~
Remember the Alamo!
I remember the Alamo!
They. LOST!
By George, he's right.
Why does this have to be the one time,
city workers start on schedule?
Mr and Mrs Addams.
We have to get out of here.
What was that?
Just deadbolts,
to ensure that no one can come in the house.
Or out.
Open this door.
This house is about to be blown to the ground.
We're going to go down with the house~!
We have to set a good example for the children.
Well, I'm not going down with it!
Ahhhh!
I've got to stop my crew before I'm... buried by the rubble... !
Rubble, shmubble!
Mama's right.
Their workers could never destroy anything with those wimpy explosives.
They need something like this.
The Megabomb 400.
Capable of destroying a small building.
And comes with its very own carrying case!
Ahhhhhhh!
... aaaaaaahhh!
And again.
That bomb should have...
leveled this place!
What's this house made of?
Steel?
No.
Titanium~
Good ol' Great Great Grandpapa Addams!
He always said why use wood,
when titanium costs three times as much,
and is completely impractical!
Yeah.
Who knew that it would save us from weak-kneed, narrow-minded bureaucrats?
No offense.
Well...
If you people can't destroy this place,
the city certainly can't.
We'll put the highway...
somewhere else!
But what about the off-ramp?
Ohh.
Don't worry.
I'm going to see to it, that,
we don't come anywhere near you!
You win, Addams.
You can keep the house.
Did you hear that, everybody!
We won!
The house is safe!
Mr Cushman,
I hope you don't mind flying coach.
Huh?
Nice man, but a little jumpy.
Cara mia...
Mmmn, mon cher~
These ropes are too tight.
That's the point.
It was sure nice of the city, to leave behind their demolition equipment.
Yes, but whatever this is,
it doesn't seem to be working.
Have you checked the power supply?
I made you say your first word.
Now I'll make you say your last.
No... !
Aaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!
Ahhh, there's no place like home!
Awoooooooo... !